Marcus Hayes: Utley, Rollins “360 pounds of ineptness around second base”

“360 pounds of ineptness around second base,” is how Marcus Hayes, the Philadelphia Daily News columnist, would describe the Phils’ double-play duo of four-time All-Star Chase Utley and two-time Rawlings’ Gold Glove Award winner Jimmy Rollins.

Hayes has been writing bad pieces for quite some time on the pages of the Philadelphia Daily News. He’s unfairly taken stabs at athletes, scribbled things that don’t make sense, and written “columns” that look like they were started fifteen minutes before deadline.

Yesterday’s joke of a piece was a terrific example.

For years now Hayes has been attacking players. But no one has gone after him. That ends today.

I emailed him last night hoping to discuss his awful piece, and in typical writer fashion, he chose to ignore my point and attack my grammar.

While explaining that I don’t usually attack columnists, but that I had to make an exception this time due to the extreme awfulness of his piece, I accidently left an “r” of “your.”

Hayes responded from his work email address within ten minutes saying, “You meant ‘your’ but you wrote ‘you.’ This is exactly the sort of constructive crirticism I actively ignore, but between your botched grammar and your incorrect use (and omission) of punctuation, I couldn’t resist replying to your. I mean, you. Oh. Wait. You wouldn’t know the difference!”

Wow, you’re right Marcus. I left an “r” off a word. That certainly gives you the right to call the duo lacking.

In fairness, Hayes did touch upon my criticism, claiming he, “passed no judgement. Because it was not a column. It was a story. Columns inject opinion. Stories report fact.”

Maybe I’m wrong Marcus, but calling the Phils’ middle-infield “360 pounds of ineptness” hardly sounds like fact.

When I pointed that out to him, he didn’t reply though. I guess he couldn’t find anything wrong with my grammar.

And who knows, maybe one day Hayes can learn how to write, to go along with his impeccable grammar.

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Filed under Editorial, Shay Roddy

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