And the five worst mascots are…

This week I’m going to have to take some time off due to some personal issues. In order to keep Phillie Phanatics alive, we’ll have a series of posts by other writers.  I wrote the below post with Tyler Mascaro who’s new to the blogosphere. This will be my last post for at least the week. Thanks and I’ll see you next week.

THE FIVE WORST MASCOTS IN THE MAJOR LEAGUES

BY TYLER MASCARO AND SHAY RODDY for Phillie Phanatics

5. The Washington Nationals’ SCREECH!

The Nationals’ fat Eagle is at the pinnacle of bad mascots.  It’s just another area where the Nationals suck.

Fast Facts:

Hatched: April 17, 2005

Habitat: The District

Position: 10th Man

Bats: Fly at Night
Throws: Parties
Favorite Food: Gummy Worms

4.  The Arizona Diamondbacks’ D. Baxter the Bobcat

D. Baxter the Bobcat is just about as lame as he sounds. And what exactly does he have to do with diamondbacks?

Fast Facts:

Born: 2000

Origin: Chose bobcat because the Diamondbacks’ home field, Bank One Ballpark,was  shortened “BOB”

Resides: Baxter’s den at Chase Field (formerly Bank One Ballpark)

Name origin: From Jay Bells’ son Brantley

3. The Tampa Bay Rays’ Raymond Ray

Raymond, who’s officially listed as a “Seadog,” has been parusing the stands at Tropicana Field since 1998. His trademark facial hair and giant sneakers have been bothering Rays fans for more than a decade.

Fast Facts:

Position: Upright and locked

Throws: Fun around the ballpark

Catches: Colds

Bats: Scare him

Favorite TV show:  He’d rather be reading

2. The Colorado Rockies’ Dinger

WTF? ‘nough said.

Fast Facts:

Origin: Dinosaur egg found at Coors Field during its construction in 2004.

Hatched: In front of a live crowd at Mile High Stadium on April 16, 1994

Interests: Reading and visiting sick children in the hospital

1. The Cleveland Indians’ Slider

I can’t even begin to describe what I think of this thing. Commonly reffered to as “the mascot that must die”, Slider is an overgrown Muppet Esq character.

Fast Facts:

Birthdate: July 29, 1990

Height: Really Up There!

Weight: You Don’t Really Want to Know . . . .

Bats / Throws: Yes! Anything & Everything

Resides: Somewhere “Underground” Behind Home Plate at Progressive Field

Favorite Food: Popcorn, Hot Dogs, and Pizza

Favorite Movie: “Muppets Take Manhattan”

Favorite TV Show: Scooby Doo

Favorite Beverage: Strawberry Shake

——–

To read more of Tyler Mascaro’s work visit his new blog Harry and Whitey: A Philadelphia Sports Blog or visit his profile on Bleacher Report

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3 Comments

Filed under Editorial, Shay Roddy

3 responses to “And the five worst mascots are…

  1. I do love those racing presidents though!

    Hope you get everything worked out, Shay.

  2. Pingback: LOTD: The Overexposure of JRod Continues With Another Podcast, SI Mention (plus other non-Ibanez Links)

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